Eagles

Wayne Blogged The...Eagles ---

The nameless, baseball sized bird that usually perches itself outside of my window was not to be seen today; instead, I am awoken by a vehicular shouting match. And as soon as I open my eyes, I am fucked. It’s raining outside- this usually doesn’t bother me, but today’s rain is different, it’s much more of a consistent drizzle than a downpour or rather pleasant mist. I should also mention that the clock reads 1 PM, which means it’s noon (I never did jump on the daylight’s saving bandwagon). Once I stumble out the door it’s already quarter past. I walk past a girl that one could only describe as “uneasily attractive”, she ignores my half smile and I continue to make my way to the mailroom. There is nothing about this morning that will stay with me past today and, strangely enough, that makes me sad.
My head is filled with (what should be forgettable) songs from the 1970s as my eyes soak in the scenes of another Tuesday morning. I’ve been listening to The Eagles’ Greatest Hits vol. 2 for about 35 minutes, and I am now prepared to fight anyone who claims Don Henley sucks. Maybe it’s because I grew up listening to these guys, or maybe it’s because I sometimes feel like takin’ it easy, but I can only think of two things wrong with The Eagles: the song “The Greeks Don’t Want No Freaks”, and Joe Walsh’s guitar faces.
My adoration for the smooth sounds of Southern California’s finest commercially successful country-rock may come as a surprise to everyone except my (non-existent) financial advisor. Over the course of my life, I have spent roughly $555 on The Eagles. This includes: three (3) concerts, two (2) concert t-shirts, two (2) live DVDs, one (1) live VHS, one (1) CD box set, three (3) greatest hits compilations, seven (7) studio albums CDs, two (2) studio albums cassettes, and two (2) live albums. Don’t even get me started on solo material!
The crazy thing is, The Eagles aren’t even my favorite band (granted they were from grades 2-9). I’ve never bought multiple copies of their albums merely for the “bonus content” which oddly enough, I already own (like I do with Elvis Costello), nor do I have a man-crush on any of the members of The Eagles (as I do with Jeff Tweedy of Wilco). In fact, I may actively participate in a conversation that mocks The Eagles, if a potential advancement in my social status rests on my inclusion in such an event. And that’s because I’m incredibly shallow, which is why I listen to The Eagles, which is why I’m shallow, etc.